Wake-up Call

Around 6:00 AM this morning my little guy trudged into our room and I pulled him up in bed with us. I was greeted by ice cold legs and feet where he had kicked his covers off. As he snuggled down between us, I tried to go back to sleep, hoping to find the dream I had been in the middle of.

Which is when the Rat Terrier woke up and jumped down from the bed. Gravity doesn't work well with Pretzel when she stands up after sleeping all night so I jumped out of bed to catch her and run to the living room where I unceremoniously dumped her out the back door.
Not having much fur, she wasn't impressed.

I didn't care. I went back to bed, grateful to see my son still curled up trying to go back to sleep. I quickly slid under the covers, pulled him close, and tightly shut my eyes hoping to go back to dreamland. I didn't care what dream at this point as long as it was good.

Then Pretzel decided to remind me it is cold outside and she started up crying and barking. Sigh. I decided to try the age old remedy of pretending to not hear her. But my husband did and the next thing I knew he was throwing back the covers (he never just slides out of bed, he must THROW the covers WAYYYY back when he gets up) and was stumbling loudly through the house to let her in.

Up pops a little boy's head. I pull him down and whisper urgently to go back to sleep.

My husband lumbers back in and sinks in bed, yanking the covers up, just as wildly as he had thrown them off.

Quietness descends once again and the I hear little paws tap-tapping through the house. Suddenly Pretzel jumps up in the bed with us. "Pretzel!!" a gleeful little voice shouts. "SSHHH, it's nite-nite time," I say. (Ok, so I realize 6:30 in the morning is not exactly night but it is Saturday and it is still dark.
He wasn't fooled. He lay still for a moment and then I hear, "But my hungwy, Mama." Then quiet. I peek through half-closed eyes and see his eyes close. Oh, I couldn't be this blessed, he's going back to sleep!

No. Because a minute later the kitten jumps on the bed as well. Pretzel decided to sound the alarm, barking madly, and scrambling after her from under the covers. After it all calms down, I try vainly to yet again convince him...myself....it's time for sleep.

I hear an earnest little whisper. "Mama! My wonts a cinny pop-tot and me milk!!"
Now I wish I could say that at this point that I lovingly swept the hair from his eyes, hugged him close, and said, "Sure, my love, and while I'm at it, let's have homemade pancakes, too!" Then I would gracefully arise, don my silk robe, and go to greet the day with a smile. I would magically transform from robe to dress with perfect makeup and hair, smiling and singing as I went. Bluebirds would fly to settle upon my window sill.
Um, that would be a decided NO! Because as my precious son declared this, I knew sleep was a lost cause and I wasn't ready to lose it. So instead I sat up and growled, "Come on! let's just GET up!" as I stomped towards the door. No silk robes or beautiful dresses. Running pants, a sweatshirt and fuzzy house slippers. No perfect hair or makeup.

Then my husband murmurs, "You need me to get up?"
Once again, I WISH I could say that I answered sweetly, "No, sweetheart, you just sleep, you need your rest."
No, instead I snapped, "No, it's fine! I got it!" Then I muttered under my breath, " That way YOU can sleep." He heard me. Sweetly he says, "Okay!"
Ggrrrr. Oh, I was a serious martyr at this point. Poor me. "I" have to do everything. "I" have to be the one to get up. What about me? Ouch. I despise that attitude.

So I prepare the "pop-tot" and milk for son and fix a cup of Hills Bro. Cappuccino for me. He wants to watch a taped episode of his favorite show Wild Kratts. Suurre, I think to myself. Why would I want to watch anything? My eyes sweep around the room taking in the mess the kids had left yesterday and I groaned at the thought of the laundry and clean-up awaiting me today. Oh, yes, I was seriously entrenched in stinkin-thinkin.
Then I checked my FB. One family had lost a beloved grandfather. Another is battling a stroke with their mother...who is only 40 years old.
One friend, a teacher, had posted a prayer in the wee hours. She's at a new school and is experiencing major spiritual warfare. She grew up separated from siblings,  being shuffled from one foster home to another to group care. She still battles that feeling of loneliness and not being accepted. But she repeatedly leans upon the Lord for her strength and guidance.
Then there's the mom with 4 kids, ages 5, 4, 2 and a newborn. She worked for me when she was a carefree teenager. Her 4 year old suffers with Mitochondrial Disease. Among the many problems it causes, he doesn't walk or interact the way her other children are able to. He has many health problems which will only grow worse as he gets older. Sleepless nights are frequent for her. She had overslept this morning. She's been working very hard on doing a fall market to benefit their missions program at church. It's taking place today and she was trying to get there.

Then there were happy posts from people who were already up and planning a day with the family.

And here I was grumbling because my little boy had the audacity to want mommy up with him. I was allowing a bad mood because I have the burden of housework. I was jealous because my husband was able to stay in bed longer. Ouch.

I remember what it is like to want children so badly and think you will not have that blessing. I remember what it is like to want a nice home. I remember what it is like to work all week outside the home to where Saturday is pretty much the only time you have to do the housework. I remember the days when my husband worked crazy night hours and I hated him being gone. And yet here I am complaining over it when I have a houseful of children, a lovely home, and my husband is home with us.
Lord, forgive me for taking your blessings for granted! While I do struggle with fatigue, it's no excuse for a bad attitude! Strengthen me and refresh me with energy and a renewed mind and spirit to face the day with gratitude! Help me to treat my family with love and to cherish them, not treat them as a burden to be tolerated. Most of all, help me to set "me" to the side and focus on You!