Well, here it is...Friday! My days are all confused what with VBS and revival. It reminds me of the time my husband woke up and thought it was a work day. This was before we really knew each other but he told me about it later. It was back when he worked construction on the oil refineries. His day would begin very early. He was usually at the job site no later than 5 or 5:30 am. Anyway he woke up on this particular day and thought he was late. He flew around and got dressed and raced to the job site only to find it empty. It was Saturday. :) I can just imagine him arriving only to find all the huge parking areas empty!
I haven't done anything like that this week but I have had a very hard time keeping up with the children's new charts. We started it on the wrong day. Then I realized my confusion and changed it. Then I realized I was still confused and still had not put the correct day! I wound up filling it in and erasing it 3 times over two days!
I've revamped our routines with the children a bit. I was just using jars for each girl and we would add beans as they obeyed and remove them if they disobeyed. If they earned enough beans in a month we would take them somewhere special. But I had slipped into a bad habit of forgetting to add or remove! So we needed something in writing to follow.
Remember I told you about all the great finds at the Dollar Tree? One package had a job chart and an empty chart.
I used the job chart to make a little daily Chore Chart for the girls. I have things like feed the dog, clean up your own mess, put away your own dirty dishes, clean up your bedroom, etc
I used the other one to make a Daily Chart. It has things on it like brush teeth am and pm, get dressed, do the chores on the other chart, put on pjs, etc. I also have spaces on there for Be Helpful and Be Kind. For everything they do on the charts I put a star. (If they do ALL their chores I will also put one for that on the daily chart. So far no extra star but that is ok...we'll get there!)
I try to catch them doing little helpful things and kind things through the day and reward them with a star. I try to encourage them to be a blessing to others. Anyway we will add up the stars and they each will earn beans based on the stars. They sometimes can earn extra beans for various little things, too. Like tackling a big job, doing something without having to be told, or jumping in to help out. BUT they can lose beans if they misbehave. Oh, and if one of them tries to get out of doing something that is their responsibility by getting the other one to do it then the one doing the job gets 2 stars! Now when they get enough beans they still get to go somewhere special. Right now they are trying to get to a pizza place in the big city that also has a playland, arcade and putt-putt.
Does all that make sense? It works for us. It gives a nice balance of responsibility, incentives, and discipline tools. It isn't the only thing we use for discipline but it helps us to stay on track a little better with teaching them to do their part.
It can be so easy sometimes to just do things around the house yourself instead of taking the time to train your children to help. But if we take the extra time to include them there are some nice little things to follow. Of course, the most obvious is that they know how to help! But it also makes them feel needed and included in the family life.
But we need to watch our attitudes! When I start feeling really swamped it's easy for me to slip into a fussing, nagging attitude. That old martyr syndrome comes out! Then I have to remind myself, now why exactly do I think the children would WANT to help out when I am making it seem so awful? :) Me complaining is not going to A) make them see how much they should help or B) get the job done any faster!
They have to see the perks of joining in together to get a job done. Mama is more relaxed. Their belongings can be found and don't get broken. They also need to know work isn't a bad thing. Make it fun! Maybe at your house that might be by opening up the blinds and turning up the music. Maybe it's by turning the jobs into a race. Perhaps set the timer for short bursts of work time followed by playtime. Or maybe you could play a game together when all the work is completed. Or go for ice cream. Or even better, make some homemade ice cream! You get my drift.
Focus on making the environment in your home happy and peaceful. But don't wait until the work is caught up to get that way. Not always an easy feat I know! I think we are all still working on that one and very seldom will you feel like you have really arrived! But take some time to evaluate what you want to teach your children or the environment you wish to create in your home. Follow that by examining your approach and attitude. Maybe there are some small things you can do to change for the better. Like a $1 chart or a free smile and hug. You might even start waking up knowing just what day it is! Blessings!
I haven't done anything like that this week but I have had a very hard time keeping up with the children's new charts. We started it on the wrong day. Then I realized my confusion and changed it. Then I realized I was still confused and still had not put the correct day! I wound up filling it in and erasing it 3 times over two days!
I've revamped our routines with the children a bit. I was just using jars for each girl and we would add beans as they obeyed and remove them if they disobeyed. If they earned enough beans in a month we would take them somewhere special. But I had slipped into a bad habit of forgetting to add or remove! So we needed something in writing to follow.
Remember I told you about all the great finds at the Dollar Tree? One package had a job chart and an empty chart.
I used the job chart to make a little daily Chore Chart for the girls. I have things like feed the dog, clean up your own mess, put away your own dirty dishes, clean up your bedroom, etc
I used the other one to make a Daily Chart. It has things on it like brush teeth am and pm, get dressed, do the chores on the other chart, put on pjs, etc. I also have spaces on there for Be Helpful and Be Kind. For everything they do on the charts I put a star. (If they do ALL their chores I will also put one for that on the daily chart. So far no extra star but that is ok...we'll get there!)
I try to catch them doing little helpful things and kind things through the day and reward them with a star. I try to encourage them to be a blessing to others. Anyway we will add up the stars and they each will earn beans based on the stars. They sometimes can earn extra beans for various little things, too. Like tackling a big job, doing something without having to be told, or jumping in to help out. BUT they can lose beans if they misbehave. Oh, and if one of them tries to get out of doing something that is their responsibility by getting the other one to do it then the one doing the job gets 2 stars! Now when they get enough beans they still get to go somewhere special. Right now they are trying to get to a pizza place in the big city that also has a playland, arcade and putt-putt.
Does all that make sense? It works for us. It gives a nice balance of responsibility, incentives, and discipline tools. It isn't the only thing we use for discipline but it helps us to stay on track a little better with teaching them to do their part.
It can be so easy sometimes to just do things around the house yourself instead of taking the time to train your children to help. But if we take the extra time to include them there are some nice little things to follow. Of course, the most obvious is that they know how to help! But it also makes them feel needed and included in the family life.
But we need to watch our attitudes! When I start feeling really swamped it's easy for me to slip into a fussing, nagging attitude. That old martyr syndrome comes out! Then I have to remind myself, now why exactly do I think the children would WANT to help out when I am making it seem so awful? :) Me complaining is not going to A) make them see how much they should help or B) get the job done any faster!
They have to see the perks of joining in together to get a job done. Mama is more relaxed. Their belongings can be found and don't get broken. They also need to know work isn't a bad thing. Make it fun! Maybe at your house that might be by opening up the blinds and turning up the music. Maybe it's by turning the jobs into a race. Perhaps set the timer for short bursts of work time followed by playtime. Or maybe you could play a game together when all the work is completed. Or go for ice cream. Or even better, make some homemade ice cream! You get my drift.
Focus on making the environment in your home happy and peaceful. But don't wait until the work is caught up to get that way. Not always an easy feat I know! I think we are all still working on that one and very seldom will you feel like you have really arrived! But take some time to evaluate what you want to teach your children or the environment you wish to create in your home. Follow that by examining your approach and attitude. Maybe there are some small things you can do to change for the better. Like a $1 chart or a free smile and hug. You might even start waking up knowing just what day it is! Blessings!
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